One of the missions in the life that is left to me is to help others to make their shift from being on the sidelines of their own life to claiming their life and getting on with it in a meaningful way. This will involve our willingness to set a direction, take action and step through the doors which hold potential behind them.
I can only do this because of my own direct and personal experience of being a charter member of the Late to Life Gang. I also know that I have to present my material to an audience which is receptive to it and to make contact with them. It does seem like a process of stepping forward and opening the right doors as they are presented.
It is in that spirit that I am going to share a dream that I had several months ago. I share the dream because it quietly dramatizes the tenacity of the “old way” to hold us back from moving forward. It also brings to the forefront the need for each of us to grapple with every clue presented to us which may help in finding our way through or around “the resistance.” This dream takes place in an art studio.
I am standing at the back of a long rectangular room. Halfway down the room, there is a wall. In the center of that wall, there is an open door.
My gaze is initially on a canvas hanging on that far wall, an empty canvas. I’m wondering how to get started and how to get the paint onto the canvas from all that distance.
Other people in the room are already getting into their paintings and drawings. One man, in particular, is catching my attention. He has expertly represented the underneath glow of the subject.
I have the sense of waiting for a teacher to show up and tell me how to start from where I am standing.
And then something happens; I notice that the door is now closed. It feels ominous. I sense it holds great significance for me.
I go around and open the door.
When I get back to my place, someone has protected my paints and easel.
——-
It took me a while to wake up from that dream. I don’t think it was fatigue, but rather … like it was holding me there.
When I finally came out of it, I feel puzzled. The first idea that came rushing towards me is that the dream is telling me that my work is not yet finished. Then I realized that there was more to unpack from this dream.
After a while, I see that some things are blatantly not right. The first is that you cannot do a painting from that distance. Secondly, the expectation that a teacher can tell me how to do something that can’t be done is wrong. Both of these come down to mistaken expectations.
It seems strange, but for a while, I couldn’t get that straight in my head. I know that it is obvious, but that is where I was stuck. That was the first clue that something was off, significantly off. There was a disconnect there between the dream and reality.
Thank you Dream: I needed you to help me get that straight! You may think that I’m kidding, but I am not. The issue of some wrong expectations just now got unkinked in ways bigger than just this dream.
Direct statement: you can’t paint from a distance like that. I also now know that the “underneath glow” that intrigued me so much can also only come from being in proximity. A certain “closeness” helps to feel into the background mood, life spark, and concealed contexts that are simultaneously pushing away from life and towards it.
But here’s the problem: I also know in my mind that the dream is reminding me that I must get going. Time is of the essence now. However, I know that my “work” will not be found in painting. It will be expressed in working with people in their transition to being more purposefully engaged in their own lives. Yes! That’s part of the interpretation even though it is not directly in the dream. I know it.
The work is not finished because it has not even begun and for the work that I am visualizing the question of emotional distance must be resolved. The dream is reminding me that creative work is part of a process and I must engage in it directly. I do that by moving towards it, i.e., reopen the door, and get in closer proximity.
There is one more puzzling piece to the dream; the canvas. One possibility is that the canvas is a bit of a “red herring.” Perhaps we could say it is a simple approximation but not a hard and fast prediction. In that case, it is a “red herring.?”
I have already said that painting is not going to be the primary means of expression and interaction. I see direct communication between myself and others, through conversations and my writings. So, why a canvas? Perhaps because it is expressive, creative and has the potential to convey emotion and better able to express the story.
The other possibility is that on some level of communication between my inner self and my more “surface” self, the dream is attempting to draw me into a place of receptivity and readiness to take action. You ask what do I mean by “another” attempt to give me a kick in the pants?
Well, in a previous post titled: The Book of Life Dream, the dream presented me with a last blank page at the end. So, in this view, this “canvas” dream is choosing another vehicle of expression since the book part was “tried” and had only partial positive results.
Only partial results – but crucial in terms of my personal journey. It has led to enormous developments in my personal, family and professional lives. It has also helped me to lay the substantial groundwork for this next stage of work, and that is what I think this dream is saying. To repeat, my work will be accomplished with a larger group of those self-selected and self-identified people who are now actively claiming the need to step finally into their own lives as active and authentic participants.
If so, I totally welcome it. The extra jolt is gladly accepted.
The irony with this post is that through the writing of it and the grappling with the interpretation, I am doing that work for you, my readers.
———
If you have found this helpful please feel free to leave a comment or a verbal message on Speakpipe.
If you leave a voice message, I may draw on it in future posts. Please leave an e-mail address where I can respond to you if indicated. If you would like a response, be sure to include an e-mail address so I can reply. If you have someone who is coming to an awareness of their life passing them by you could share this post with them.
